Friday, March 12, 2010

Unrelated Captions

Earlier this month, bequeathed to me a fantastic website of highly hilarious captioned photos... that make no sense. As the name suggests Unrelated Captions basically pairs all the best pictures on the internet with unrelated captions to produce hilarious results. Merrissa and I thought we would try our hand at it... here are some of our first efforts.

New Feature: My Life is Maury

Merrissa and I were perusing the internets this weekend and stumbled upon My Life is Twilight and decided that our lives were too awesome to merely be Twilight... our lives had to be Maury.


I'm a 14 year old stripper who doesn't know who my babydaddy is, LULZ... MLIM

I have a secret... I'm secretly a MAN!... AND the father of our love-child! MLIM

I have a secret! I have a Twin Sister! AND WE'RE BOTH STRIPPERS! MLIM

I'm obsessed with a fictional vampire and it "ecclipses" all my real-life social interactions... MLIM also Twilight.

Remember when I said I didn't cheat on you? My lie detector test determined that was a lie... up to 10 different times! MLIM

I have a unibrow fetish. MLIM

My cats are my life... also my lovers. MLIM

You're welcome

-Rampaige and MJ

Thursday, March 11, 2010

New Software

Okay, so I just got a new computer and I've been spending the past couple days setting it up and installing all my spiffy software. Among my spiffy new software, is a brand new Novel-based word processor to complement my spiffy screenwriting software and I've been just ITCHING to try it out and actually write a few chapters of something as a way to distract me from working on the new pilot I'm supposed to be writing.

Anywho... I've been tossing ideas around in my head for what to write and I've come up with a few different options.

A) Some sort of memoir cataloging my short yet somewhat interesting existence and following my best friend Merrissa's and my quest to be One Hit Wonders while also having action figures of ourselves.

B) A sweeping Romance Novel about Vikings, or Pirates, or Space Viking Pirates... or a Zombie Outbreak... basically a love story that somehow flourishes against insurmountable odds.

C) A "How-to" Book on being awesome... or you know, cooking or something.

D) A Girl's Guide to Horror Films and other things involving corpses.

Anyway, I'm leaving it up to you guys. Vote! Tell me what you like best! I'll get started on the winner and post chapters of it as I finish them.


Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Songs that Remind me of People!

My parents were in town this past weekend and we got onto the topic of which songs reminded us of whom so I decided to compile a list of people and songs that remind me of them. Enjoy!

My Dad: Spider Pig

For the Facebook Peeps:

I'm not sure why... it just does.

My Mom: Hold On - Wilson Phillips

For the Facebook Peeps:

Without fail, every time this song comes on the radio my mom will ask me who it's by. Every single time, I reply, "Wilson Phillips, Mom" I have no idea what she does with this information. To my knowledge she's never downloaded the song, or bought a Wilson Phillips album and I think at this point she's just messing with me.

Erin: Flourescent Adolescent - The Arctic Monkeys

For the Facebook Peeps:

Erin says that if I ever succeed in making my Vampire movie that this song should play over the credit sequence... I agree wholeheartedly.

Former Roommate Merrissa: Come on Eileen - Dexy's Midnight Runners

For the Facebook Peeps:

Every single time Merrissa and I get in my car to go somewhere, and she DJ's with my iPod she plays this song first. Every. Single. Time. Luckily it's an awesome song.

Current Roommate Nikki: Cherry Pie - Warrant

For the Facebook Peeps:

When I lived with Nikki the first time, in my younger college days, this song was at the same time, her phone ring, text tone, and alarm clock... for like 6 months. As a result, I know all the words.

Current Roommate Ricky: Informer - Snow

For the Facebook Peeps:

There was a time when Merrissa claimed that the only thing she wanted for Christmas was for me to learn all the lyrics to this song... I never did... because to this day I cannot find a conclusive agreement on what the lyrics are. That doesn't stop Ricky and I from mumbling through it constantly.

Melody: What's Your Fantasy - Ludacris

Video and song possibly NSFW... depending on where you work.

For the Facebook Peeps:

This is honestly one of Mel's favorite songs... which cracks me up every time I think about it.

Will: We Are the Champions - Queen

For the Facebook Peeps:

Sam Morrow: Whistle for the Choir - The Fratellis

For the Facebook Peeps:

Mainly because she's a fellow Fratelli lover, but mostly because she and I share an appreciation for this song specifically.

Michelle Beard: Don't Dream it's Over - Sixpence None the Richer

For the Facebook Peeps:

Michelle put this on a mixtape for me back in high school... when we still used tapes for mixtapes... like champions. I actually still have the tape, sadly no where to play it.

Nick Chavez: Head Over Heels - Tears For Fears

For the Facebook Peeps:

I think I remember Nick at one time saying this was his favorite song... I might be completely wrong, but either way, it still reminds me of him.

Krystol McIntyre: Bump Bump Bump - B2K

For the Facebook Peeps:

Basically any B2K/Omarion song reminds me of Krystol, and probably always will. It also makes me think of this girl in High School who had "Raz-b is Dumb Fine" written on her binder.

Okay, I know there's a TON more I could come up with, so if you want me to tell you what song reminds me of you then put it in the comments. I'm also curious to find out if any songs remind people of me, so put that in the comments too!

Rampaige, out!

Paige's Favorite Albums and Why... Part Deux!

Two posts in a day, aren't you guys lucky :)

As soon as I posted my last list of favorite albums, I realized there were some big albums missing. Albums that I can listen to, in their entirety, in one sitting. Albums that play over the sound system at work, that magically don't drive me insane. Albums that are just plain awesome, these, are those albums...


Amy Winehouse: Back to Black

I was lucky enough to obtain this little gem on vinyl this week. I've heard many people argue for the more radio-friendly, less obscene stylings of Amy's fellow Brit Duffy, and while I enjoy Duffy's Rockferry quite a bit she never seems to be able to capture the same aching soulful sound that Amy does. Listening to Amy Winehouse makes me feel like she's got more emotion in one crack addled nostril than I have in my entire being. It's rare that you find someone who sounds so painful, and yet so beautiful at the same time. Just witness this awesomeness...

There's a small bit of cussing in the beginning, but other than that I think it should be SFW.

For all the facebook peeps:

I heard my sister even learned this song on the Ukelele, and says she'll leave a video of it on my wall... I have yet to see such a video, but I'm sure when I do it will be magnificent. :)
Download: Back to Black, Me and Mr. Jones, Tears Dry on Their Own, and the rest of the album.

Adele: 19

Much in the same vein as Ms. Winehouse, Adele hails from the UK but sounds like Motown, and in my experience you really can't go wrong with Motown, no way no how. She's a little lighter than her darker boozy counterpart, but not as airy as Duffy. Aka, less painful, but still gritty. I think the true measure of an artist is how well they sing their songs live, and Adele is a live performance champ, as evidenced in this video with just her voice and a guitar...

For the Facebook Peeps:

This is my absolute favorite song off her debut album, and I know it's good because it was on my store's rotation for 3 months and I never got tired of it. I would actually look forward to it playing at work. It's rare that I can actually enjoy the music in the store, since even the best songs become grating after a long day of dealing with surly customers, but Adele beat the odds.
Download: Chasing Pavements, Right as Rain, etc.

Rooney: Self Titled and Calling the World

I nearly slapped myself when I realized that neither of these albums were on my first list. I was lucky enough to see Rooney live when they came to UCI a few years ago and it was an interesting experience to say the least... but! They were AMAZING! They sound exactly like they do on their CD. And if you're wondering if the lead singer is that guy from Princess Diaries, the answer is yes. I think the band is actually in the movie at one point, playing the end of this song...

For all the Facebook Peeps:

Download: Blueside, Sorry Sorry, Shakin', When Did Your Heart Go Missing, and basically everything else...

They also have a new album due out this June!

The Police: Greatest Hits

Why is it that the bands who can't get along and stay together make the best music. The Police are truly legendary, their songs have been covered dozens of times and yet their originals still stand the test of time. Every time someone plays that crappy Roxanne cover from Moulin Rouge a little piece of me dies inside, because this is what Roxanne SHOULD sound like...

For the Facebook Peeps:

Download: Roxanne, Message in a Bottle, Every Little Thing She Does is Magic, Don't Stand so Close to Me...

Death Cab for Cutie: Narrow Stairs

I actually have this on vinyl as well as CD and I have to say that this is a great album to just set and forget. Just turn it on, and you won't even notice how it meanders from song to song because it flows so well, I did eventually differentiate the songs enough to have a favorite...

For the Facebook Peeps:

Download: I Will Possess Your Heart, Cath

Michael Jackson: Off the Wall

You know all those awesome Michael Jackson songs that aren't Thriller? Yeah... they're like all on this album, no lie...

For the Facebook Peeps:

All this album needs is Billie Jean, Smooth Criminal, Bad, Black and White, and Thriller to be a nearly complete Michael Jackson's Greatest hits album.

Happy Listening,